Monday, 20 January 2014

The Family Bed

"Oh you don't want to get into that habit!", "That's it now there's no getting them out" etc etc 2, amongst others, of phrases we would hear about having L in the bed with us.

Honestly I never even thought about it before he was born, I just assumed he would sleep when he was supposed to and in his cot...what was I thinking?! L is not the best sleeper although he's improving. Anyone who's read his monthly updates would see that I've mentioned a few times that since day 1 he's had a thing of waking between 4am and 5am and dozing on and off until we got him up between 7am and 8am. He was a very restless newborn in general. We got used to this but couldn't get used to or cope with the going in and out of is room every 20 mins or so to either give him the dummy or put him back on his side (will not sleep on his back!) so we just started bringing him in with us in those early hours and he would snuggle down and go off to sleep again for another few hours.
I personally don't see any negatives about co sleeping like this, in fact I came across this article  recently that put my mind at ease even more so.
However, before seeing that and because of the comments mentioned above I stressed out about this fact, I worried that we were doing more harm than good by having him in with us, that he would never get used to sleeping through in his own bed and we would never get a full nights sleep again! Well we are still waiting on the full nights sleep but I don't see any harm in him co sleeping with us for those few hours in the morning, in fact I love waking up to see him snuggled under his Daddy's arm in between us and the one recent night where he did stay in his own bed until he got up, I missed him being next to us! Now ideally with me being back at work and my alarm going off at 6.30am four mornings a week it would be better for L to stay in his own bed instead of being woken and disturbed with me getting up for work but obviously he just isn't ready for it yet.
Now we did try to change the situation and tried to get him to sleep in his own room until he got up but after a few nights of in and out for 3 or so hours we decided for the good of us all that he just continue to come in with us. So he does and we will let him for as long as he needs to, I know he'll get to the point eventually where he will stay in his own bed in his room all night but for now we are just going to enjoy those early morning snuggles and enjoy those precious moments of waking up to him beside us because I have no doubt that in years to come when he's a big boy we will relish those cuddly memories.

What do you think of co sleeping? is it something you do with your little ones?



  1. we happily co sleep when it's needed. We did for the first 6 weeks solely, then we moved house and set her cot up and there she stayed! Until 4 months when we had sleep regression and now it's a mix of our bed and her cot! I think there is NOTHING wrong with it, mothers have been sleeping with their babies for thousands of years. It's more natural than putting them in what is effectively a wooden cage! Obviously I don't feel guilty for putting her in her cot. My mother in law is SO anti bed sharing, she finds the whole idea outrageous!

    Lauren | Belle du Brighton x

    1. Oh we had the 4month sleep regression too,now we have teething! It works for all of us to co sleep at the moment. I don't feel guilty about havng him in a cot either but when hes going through things like teething and growth spurts I'd rather he was nearer to us at night so that he's morw comforted. Everyone will have an opinion anyway so best to not pay too much attention :)

  2. We co sleep with our 16 month old, on and off, I always start with him in his own bed and he ends up with us at some point but not always. I don't see the harm in it, it's something we and him enjoy :-) I too miss him the nights he doesn't come into the bed, these moments don't last forever so we may as well enjoy them x


  3. So won't be long before they are embarrassed by their parents nevermind come in for night time snuggles! hehe :) xo

  4. We've gone through stages of co-sleeping with our 17 month old. If she wouldn't settle in her cot, she was poorly or just wouldn't sleep for whatever reason, bringing her into our bed meant that she would settle and we could continue to snooze (she would sleep well but that wasn't always the case for us!). We had lots of comments about not letting it become a habit etc but I've always gone with my gut instinct. Not only that but what they want changes so quickly its not necessarily a long lived 'thing'. I say enjoy it whilst it lasts x

    1. Yes its definitely a case of what "mum knows best" in these situations! I don't worry about it anymore, soon enough he'll be an independent little mister and probably won't want to have bed time snuggles! Last night he was in with us most of the night because he's sick at the moment xo

  5. Co-sleeping is wonderful and certainly nothing wrong with it :) Enjoy it while it lasts! My little guy [now 2!] was fine in his moses basket but HATED his cot. The only way I could get any sleep [and him too, really] is by co-sleeping. He has now settled in his own 'big boy' bed in his own bedroom but I will treasure the time we spent co-sleeping. I wouldn't hesitate to do it with another baby. please don't listen to what others say, listen to your heart and you know best as his mummy xx


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