Monday, 3 February 2014

Bottle Vs Breast

I've tossed the idea around a lot recently about writing a post on the whole bottle vs breast feeding argument but wasn't quite sure how or when to do it! I find there is such a stigma around this whole debate and since becoming a Mum myself I never realised how intense this subject was.
However I came across this picture on Facebook recently that kind of summed it all up for me:


Now let me start by saying, I bottle fed my little boy, still am. We trialed a few different forms of formula before finally finding one that suited him and that was that. I went into the whole feeding situation very open minded and when asked by the midwives in my check up's would I be breast feeding, I said yes, I would most definitely be giving it a try. That's as much as I thought about it really, I didn't allow myself to be put under any pressure over this. While I fully understand that breast milk is what's best for baby, I'm also aware that me, my sister, my niece's etc were brought up on formula and there were no issues. I was also aware of the fact that complications may arise, baby might not take to the breast, I might not be able to feed etc, I wasn't going to beat myself up over it. I know there are benefits for mum as well as baby. The one thing I did worry about slightly was colic, I'd heard such horror stories about babies with colic who were on formula. However I have come to realise that while it may be true, formula fed babies may be more prone to colic, I also came to see that breast fed babies could also develop it. 
While I don't feel I need to justify my reasons for bottle feeding my baby, some people sure as hell try and make you feel like you should! I've encountered the disapproving tone and looks, the somewhat superior attitude of parents who have or are breast feeding, but not one of them would have asked me why I decided not to breast feed, it seems they'd rather assume I just couldn't be bothered or for the convenience etc. For a very short while I would begin to justify why I wasn't breast feeding when I was asked how I was feeding my baby but then stopped myself, there is no need for me to defend my actions on this matter, nor should there be for anyone else. It's an extremely personal choice. I most certainly wouldn't turn around to someone who was breast feeding with disappointment just because it was something I wasn't doing. I would never expect a parent to feel they have to justify their decisions to me on how they feed their baby either. 
In my own personal experience, I witnessed this "disapproving" attitude in the hospital, from the midwives. Once I'd made my decision to bottle feed, they completely backed off from me for the rest of my time there except for lovely midwife who for the life of me, I can't remember her name but she was one of the very few who didn't make me feel like I was being judged. 

There are so many different reasons as to why a mother would chose to bottle feed over breast feed and I think much more consideration should be taken when discussing this issue, whether they wish to divulge their reason's or not, there should be as much respect for the mother who bottle feeds her baby as there is for the mother who breast feeds. 
So really, to me, as it says above, I don't care if you bottle or breast feed our baby, as long as you doing what you think is best and with love for your baby and yourself then I fully support you.

8 comments:

  1. Babies need fed, whether it be from a bottle or breast, it has to happen :) And whatever suits each family best is really what is best for baby, isn't it? I am an avid breastfeeder, but have many friends who bottle feed for a variety of reasons - all of which are nobody's business but theirs, like you said :)
    I find that now, at 10 months, people are starting to question me as to why I am not STOPPING breastfeeding! Other people always have something negative to say about how we raise our babies - as long as we and our babies are happy that's all that matters x

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    1. Exactly, it's most definitely a personal choice, one to suit the each family and their needs. I am completely for breast feeding and have the utmost respect for the mother's like you who decided to take that route for the feeding journey. I just wish the formula feeding mum's got the same respect, I hate to think that women become so judgemental over this topic when really we should be supporting each other no matter what we decide. And yes since becoming a mum I have found that everyone has an opinion ;)
      Thanks very much for your comment :) xo

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  2. This is the one debate I just don't get. But then I don't get a lot of things that some mothers seem to find acceptable to put down other mothers for. I breastfed both my girls, one for 11 months and the other is still feeding once a day at 12 months. It was one of the hardest things I ever did, but I did it because I wanted too. Not because I felt I should, or because others were, but because I wanted too. If I had wanted to bottle feed I would have done that too. I was bottle fed, my sister was bottle fed and my husband was bottle fed. As long as you feed, nourish, and love your baby who gives a stuff how you feed them? There will always be negative people whatever we do as parents! x

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  3. Exactly! I never realised how much there was to debate about until I became a mother, it quite surprised me! As long as we are all doing what we believe is right for our children and they ahve all the love they need then I think we are all doing a good job :) xo

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  4. As a breastfeeding mother [to my 2-year-old!] I completely understand this article and I don't understand this argument either. I'm all for breastfeeding counselling & support & education, but after all of that it is the mother's choice and what she believes is right for her and her baby. I must agree with Sarah Jay on the first comment though, I have received judgement FOR breastfeeding from people asking why he isn't taking a bottle yet [when he was several months old] and WHEN I'm stopping! It's such a personal choice and I know that breastfeeding is best for me and my son just as you knew bottle feeding was best for you and your baby :) xx

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    1. I think either way no matter what we do as mothers we'll be judged! I recently read another blog post about a woman breastfeeding an older child and she experienced the judging and questions. I don't understand how people can think it's ok to question you on something so personal. As long as it works for you and your family then keep going xo

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